MG Adoption Application

When we adopted our cocker spaniel from the animal shelter, they had
a two page questionnaire to determine if someone is qualified to own
a dog. Shouldn't the same to be required before someone is allowed
to own an MG? Consider this questionnaire:

1. Are you ready to love this car, unconditionally?
2. Do you realize that you will have to understand almost everything
about this car, including the engine, transmission, brakes,
carburetors, etc.?
3. If you already know about cars, are you willing to learn a whole
new vocabulary?
4. Are you willing to associate constantly with other MG owners?
5. Do you know a nearby mechanic with expert knowledge about MGs If
yes, skip to # 12.
6. Are you willing to get greasy? All over? In your eyes, hair,
skin, clothing, etc.?
7. Are you willing to shed blood?
8. Do you own a fire extinguisher?
9. Do you realize this car will cost more money than what you can
sell it for?
10. If you already own tools, are you willing to purchase a whole
new set?
11. Do you possess a large vocabulary of four-letter words?
12. Is your spouse or significant other an MG lover? If yes skip to
#14.
13. Are you familiar with the process for divorce or separation from
a spouse or significant other?
14. Do you have another, reliable car?
15. Do you have garage space? For the car, parts, tools, more parts?
16. Do you have a problem with puddles of oil?
17. Puddles of gasoline?
18. Puddles of blood?
19Do you know that Hypoid oil is? Its application? The difference
between it and crankcase oil?
20. Are you sure you love this car?
21. Do you think "a little rust" is ok?
22. Can you recognize "a lot" of rust?
23. Does seeing daylight through your floorboards bother you?
24. Are you willing to drive without musical entertainment so that
you can enjoy the incomparable pleasure of listening to your engine
run - and attempt to listen for new problems as they develop?
25. Do you love this car above all others?
26. Do you worry what other people think?
27. Do you think purchasing an MG is a practical decision?
28. How do you feel about people asking you, "What year is that
Karmann-Ghia?"
29. Are you sure you're feeling alright today?
30. Are you taking any medication?
31. Have you ever paid money to ride in an MG?
32. Isn't your relationship with this car a little unnatural?

Source: The MGB Experience. Written by: Philippe Tusler.(sorry phil,
hope you don't mind me posting this)